There IS a Game This Week....Right?

I'm sure by now we all have seen the terrible Ray Rice video and all of the actions that have followed. Backlash, suspensions, accusations, depression. Just doesn't feel like there is about to be a game on Thursday night. Most haven't been able to focus on the true meaning of Steelers week. So without further adieu here are some fun things I have gotten to do this week.

Marvel at the fact that in my home there are equal amounts Steeler memorabilia as Raven stuff. 

I mean why not? What Ravens fan doesn't have a handful of shirts, jerseys, huddler (NFL Snuggie ripoff), blankets, and bobbleheads scattered through their home? What Ravens fan gets to look over every morning on his wife's night stand and see Terry Bradshaw's goofy face? I'll give you a hint, he has two thumbs and is overusing questions in this paragraph.

Make a Steelers fan spell Roethlisberger without using their phone, newspaper, jersey, computer or speak and spell.

No seriously give it a shot. In fact do it to one that still hasn't gotten their GED. Shouldn't be too hard to find one of those, right?

The mere mention of Santonio Holmes and goal line in the same sentence...

Still makes me cringe. Coworker did this to me the other day and immediately began laughing at my face. The ruling on the field what?!? No way. He wasn't in. THE LACES WERE IN! 

No matter what the context, Bart Scott

If you have no idea the meaning of that last sentence I'm going to need you to hand in all that memorabilia we spoke about earlier. Here, let me refresh your memory. We were smashing the Steelers to a tune of 35-7 when Scott came off the edge untouched and completely obliterated Big Ben. I get "the look" when I bring that up to Steeler fans. That look, priceless.

Ngata broken nose

Sure Steelers fans talk about how we have thugs and wife beaters on our team. Oh yeah? Well Ngata just broke Ben's nose. So, take that!

Argue with some idiot Pats fan about the greatest rivalry in football

Here is an example of how that one starts, "Brady/Manning is the greatest rivalry in football!" Oh really? Sure it is one of the greatest matchups between arguably the top 2 QBs in the sport over the past decade but last time I checked those games tend to be pretty one sided. Give me an old fashioned punch me and I'll punch you back game that ends in a 16-13 victory. Both teams being evenly matched not only at the QB position but in all parts of the game. In the same division, it is just hard to sell the Pats against Manning. They maybe meet once or twice a year and after that there may be a hiatus. Ravens and Steelers are teams with the same tough guy bravado that plain don't like each other. It's like a bad 80's movie that you can't turn away from.

Figure out what excuse to use on Friday when you show up to work and still smell like you watched a late night football game

Personally speaking I have to beat the sun to work. It is not going to be a good day. I'm leaning towards using, "I got a fever," in my best Christopher Walken voice. Especially if I have to see the face of smiling Steeler fans there for 8 hours straight.

Remind the Steelers that Baltimore already gained 100 yards on them

Yeah, Terrance West graduated from Towson. He counts. He did that on 16 carries while 4 Browns backs gained at least 50 yards. Remember when you saw they tied the game? Raise your hand if you couldn't believe it. I honestly thought I was being punked. They blew a 24 point lead, at home to. . . THE BROWNS? Not Johnny Foosball, but Hoyer, a truckload of running backs and the hurry up offense? Get out of here.

All in all we just need to focus on football. Hopefully this has made you forget about that stupid. overplayed video. Don't hone in on that negative. Come on people, Steelers week is upon us. So get out there and mock a fan today!