10 Things You're Thinking About Before the Orioles Season Starts

Perhaps non-Oriole fans aren't asking these questions but we as Oriole nation are asking them. Why 10? We are the tenth man after all. Plus I can't completely rip off MLB Networks Prime 9. These are ten things that should be on the minds of us, the fans of "dem O's". Or as some of us may have affectionately called them the "d' O's" (a play on Homer Simpsons "D'oh!"). So unlike a Tiger Woods press conference, let's get to the questions.

1. Did we really sign Miguel Tejada?

• What is he like 40? Honestly we don't know. All false birth certificates and b-12 injection jokes aside, he is still a decent player. Most of us are familiar with Josh Bell, who the O's acquired in the George Sherrill trade at the deadline last season from the Dodgers. If you aren't, know he is the future at third base. Which is why Mora is now in Colorado and Tejada is just filler at the position until Bell is ready. Bell passed the AA test last season when he belted 20 homers and had a respected .295 avg. This isn't a question about Bell. Tejada was a doubles machine last season when he had 46 of them while batting .313 in 158 games. Yes, the homerun numbers are down but that is not why we got him. We have more then enough power without Tejada. With him we have depth at SS in case of another Izturis injury and a solid veteran in our clubhouse. Hopefully he is in better spirits then a few years ago when he left for a "winning franchise" in Houston. Which he should be, considering he signed here. I mean, what were his other options, the Nationals? More then likely Tejada will split time at third, shortstop and DH.

2. Will the lineup be any good?

• We are the projected fifth best lineup in baseball. So let's go with yes. We have the best outfield in the American League East in my opinion with two gold glove caliber players in Jones and Markakis. Add the young Reimold in the mix and we are solid in the outfield. Where are we going to put Pie? He will get his time as well more then likely in left or in center to give Jones a break. Still our starting lineup will probably look something like this. Roberts(2b), Markakis (RF), Jones (CF), Scott (DH), Reimold (LF), Wieters(C), Tejada(3b), Atkins (1B), Izturis (SS). Listed in batting order of course. If this is how the opening day lineup looks I wouldn't be surprised but Reimold and Jones could flip flop or Wieters could move up. Some people have Jones predicted as hitting seventh in our lineup. We shall see what Spring Training shows in our young players like Wieters and Reimold. If they perform well, Jones batting seventh could be a reality.

3. Will anyone hit 30 homers?

• Yes, Matt Wieters...from both sides of the plate! (That was for you Antoine!) All MattWietersfacts.com-like jokes aside, we didn't have one last year. We may not have one this year. If Scott stays healthy all season he is our best bet unless of course someone from our youth movement shows up. Considering that Markakis is more likely to hit .300 then hit 30 homers, I doubt it.

4. Will Brian Matusz be in our starting rotation on opening day?

• Well, he is the fifth best prospect in baseball and has experience from last year. Still with rookie status so he could be a serious contender for rookie of the year. At this point he has had two bullpen sessions down in Sarasota and is feeling good. Working in curveballs and improving his two seamer to his sessions. Most importantly, looking forward to touring ballparks again with his budding bromance, Chris Tillman. The comradery in this young group of pitchers really stands out, hopefully their performance does as well.

5. Will any pitcher win 15 games?

• My confidence levels are high with this one. While we did have a 17 game loser last year, ironically enough this was also the team leader in wins (10, Guthrie). The last 15 game winner we had was Mr. Personality himself, Erik Bedard back in 2006. Please, someone win 15 so that I never have to say that again. While Bedard was a dominant pitcher, his injuries have seemed to dominate him ever since he left Baltimore. Sorry I couldn't hear the smallest violin playing over Adam Jones and George Sherrill being all stars/awesome. So by playing 6 degrees of separation, Bedard won a gold glove last season for the O's playing centerfield. Way to go!

6. Can we have more than 1 player in the All Star game?

• Nothing against Adam Jones, he deserved to go last year (hello I wrote a blog supporting that!), but it would be nice to see more O's in the game. I know Markakis will never start in the All Star game as long as Ichiro is playing which I am okay with. I would take him being an alternate this season. In all honesty, Matt Wieters might be our best option to make the team in addition to anyone else. Considering how weak the AL is with catchers, as long as he performs he could do it. Especially since he is more widely known then others. Yes, I know Varitek will start no matter his stats, thank you Red Sox nation, but Wieters could be the backup. Considering Joe Girardi (an AL East manager) will be coaching the team and seeing Wieters on a regular. Who knows? I don't see you taking a stab at the All Star guessing game. What is more likely is that Jones will repeat or Markakis will make his first appearance. Since those two were the highest O's on the ballot last season.

7. Who will we trade by the deadline?

• Don't be surprised if it is Miguel Tejada. Expiring contract, decent hitter, plays solid defense and would have no issues being traded to a winning team. I mean, it's not likely that we would trade him within our own division for obvious reasons. With Jeter in New York, Scutaro in Boston and Bartlett in Tampa Bay. Lord knows the Blue Jays aren't going to be buyers in July. So why would they give up talent they recently acquired in the Halladay deal? There are teams in the NL that might look at Tejada seriously, maybe the Cubs.

8. Should I pay my money to watch these guys?

• I know times are hard but if you are a fan of baseball and the O's, get out to the Yard! Without sounding like or better than a PR person for the team, this could be the season they turn it around. If you are one of those fans that wants to see a win, go early in the season as we tail off towards the end the past few years. The young talent is really fun to watch and there is a 90% chance you are going to see someone in our outfield make a spectacular play. If Pie is out there...that lowers the percentage. I'm not saying to just go to Red Sox/Yankee games. No matter how many I tell to come, there is a 100% chance Orioles fans will be outnumbered. Nats games are always fun since you will never hear this from any of them, "Remember how awesome we were when we went to the playoffs/won the World Series?" Or the newly updated "27!" Seriously, we have seen the shirt and look Yankee fans, we know. Blah blah blah dynasty. Remember your best player in history was from Baltimore. So, SUCK ON THAT!

9. Are we going to matter in the AL bEast?

• You know what, we just might. I know the term of "this year's Rays" is being thrown our direction but that is the thing. That was only two years ago. No one was saying that about any team minus people mocking the Devil Rays. Maybe if we change the team name to just O's then life will be simpler. So we can all watch sportscasters and reporters alike say, "how bout them Oriole....er I mean O's!" The biggest concern of every fan is our pitching. While I can't say I am happy to be older then half of the staff, at least for a change I can say I'm not more talented (oooo diss!). Games will be decided by our bullpen due to our staff's youth so right now that is my biggest concern. If our starters can have quality starts and perform like all the experts think they can we may be able to snag a wild card spot.

10. Wait, a wild card spot? Brandan, what are you smoking/drinking?

• Uhm, hope? Luck? Andy MacPhail's spiked punch? Realistically I have us as the third team in the division. Above .500 for the first time in years. The Blue Jays are probably going to take fifth which has to be expected losing the talent they have over the past few years. The Rays are hoping, like us, that their young pitchers can lead them toward another winning season and hopefully the playoffs. I like ours as opposed to theirs. I am bias though. However, major league hitters have seen Price and seem to handle him well. He did not perform well as a starter last year after looking stellar in the playoffs when they went to the World Series. Plus, we have the third best lineup in the division. The only position, offensively that is, where power numbers will not matchup is first and third base. I highly doubt Tejada and Atkins. If Atkins from 2007 or 2008 shows up, then I will stand corrected. Give him some time with Terry Crowley, who has turned a lot of people around in his time. Here is hoping the baseball experts are wrong and Atkins is not past his prime.

So there it is. I am sure there are other questions that people may be asking and if there are any that you guys have feel free to post them in the comments. I will answer them as quickly as I can. Thanks for reading and I look forward to BSing with you in the future. Until next time. GO O's!

10 Random Thoughts

It my shock some of you that I had one thought let alone ten. These are just some things that are on my mind lately or have been for awhile. While sticking to the blogs message of sports and entertainment of course.



In some cases I was going to try to write a blog about these things but they couldn't carry a blog on their own.



1. Terrell Suggs should not be known as T-Sizzles

• There is nothing about Suggs that sizzles for me or any women I know. What sizzles is his play on the field. I get it. However there are better names to have. Suggs will forever be known as "The Suggernaut" in my house. How awesome would it be to hear a commentator whip out a, "Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuggs Got-chaaaaaaaaa!" What if his helmet flies off during a play in which Jamaal Charles from Kansas City bowls him over? "Oh Charles you're messin' with his head! He had that helmet since the fourth grade!" If he pushes a lineman into a QB, the technical term will be that he hit said QB "with his own pimp." If you aren't rolling on the floor laughing by now then you have never seen the My Way Production version of X-Men. I would like to be there if this were to pick up just to hear Suggs tell Tom Brady, "You can't mess with me! I'm the Suggernaut b!t@h!"

2. If you aren't from Indianapolis and you aren't cheering for New Orleans Sunday...

• You have no soul. I don't care if you put all your money on the Colts, the Saints are America's team. Not George Dubya's team, but ever since Katrina the city has always looked to the Saints for uplifting. For the first time in franchise history they made it to the big show and what will follow in New Orleans should they win? One of the biggest drinking binges in history. Look for the state to be shutdown for a week if they win. Biggest state wide hangover...ever. A tiger will be in every body's bathroom down there. Don't worry though, he will be dreaming of Halle Berry in her Catwoman suit in no time.

3. Why is David Letterman's popularity increasing?

• I watched his show a few times just to see how much he would bash NBC/Jay Leno this week (not as much as I thought he would) and it wasn't impressive. The funniest moment was when Bruce Willis donned a Jets jersey, ran all over the studio to celebrate the Jets making the Super Bowl. To then only misspell the infamous Jets spelling chant, "J-E-T-E-S!" Uhm, no Bruce that is wrong. At least he called himself out on it afterwards. Clearly, I don't have a dog in the late night battle. That is until Conan possibly comes back in September, hopefully.

4. Something will rise for Chris Johnson

• It may not be his salary, which probably means he will hold out for a better contract. What will rise is his draft position in next year's fantasy draft. If he isn't your number 1 pick after this year, something is really really wrong with whoever has the first pick. Do I blame the guy for wanting a raise? No. He broke the record for yards from scrimmage. It isn't like that happens every year. When it comes to sports contracts, players are only as good as their last season. When that season was a record setting year, they have to take advantage of it. Just unfortunate that Johnson was in the second year of a five year contract.

5. Why does the NHL screw themselves?

• I don't follow hockey however, the games I think about checking out are always against better stuff. Its like Jay Leno in prime time against, long pause, anything (cue rim shot). Ovechkin against Crosby played each other for the first time a couple weeks ago. Ironically the same night as Lebron vs Kobe. Their next meeting is this Sunday. I forget what is on but it's something super I am sure. Honestly, if this was the NFL, these teams would play on opening night. It is the match up that everyone wants to see so why delay it? Plus most of who you are trying to draw in have already forgotten about the stellar match up in the playoffs won by Crosby and the Penguins last season.

6. Way to wait until Conan couldn't fire back to talk smack Leno

• In an interview with Oprah last week, Jay stayed classy by blasting Conan, saying he was disrespecting the Tonight Show franchise with his low ratings. Jay, you disrespected television with your prime time yuckfest. Big city news markets have you to blame for their ratings dropping by nearly 50%. I know you blame NBC but man up. You chose to stick with the network instead of going somewhere else and starting anew. Entertainment Weekly has The Jay Leno Show ranked number 1 for the worst move in television history. In the words of a fellow NBC employee, "You're fired!"

7. Whatever happened to those Guitar Hero lists I promised

• To be perfectly honest, Guitar Hero 5 came out and had most of the songs I was suggesting. Which led to the demise of the list, that in addition to fantasy football season starting. While I do not own the game, I still know what is on it. Before too long I will get another list on here because there are definitely some creative lists I can come up with that Red Octane might miss. The track list on GH 5 is awesome, one of my suggestions "The Spirit of Radio" by Rush is insane I'm sure. In the words of Wayne Campbell, "it will be mine, oh yes, it will be mine."

8. Everyone is picking the Baltimore Orioles as a sleeper this season

• Is there any other team that they could pick? I mean, the Nationals are still awful. The Indians haven't gotten better. Most top teams are still that, with the Red Sox and Yankees leading the pack as favorites in the AL. The biggest pickup being Lackey for the Sox. Personally, no one really picked true sleepers until the Rays went worst to first. So, now if we suck like usual, we have them to blame. Thanks Rays! I do like how the lineup looks, Antoine Pollard expects Matt Wieters to hit the warehouse and break every window in the process. Having a solid veteran in the rotation will help our young starters. Think Kris Benson a few years back. He taught Bedard how to throw a curveball, Bedard knew how to be a jerk on his own. Millwood is a much better pitcher then Benson so hopefully he can show these young boys some new tricks. The biggest issue is, as it usually is, our bullpen. Let's see what happens. Should I grow out my facial hair between wins? Considering I would barely look like a normal 13 year old with the amount of hair I would get, going to say no on that one.

9. New Super Mario Bros. Wii was the number 1 selling game of the year

• Which is pretty crazy when you think about it. I mean it was only out in mid-November. A new installment of the classic with the awesomeness of multiplayer. In my house it is useless since only a two year old will play it with me. My only beef with the game is more items. While I love the new penguin getup, I crave being able to fly with a racoon tail or cape. The game is still awesome, mostly due to my Wii being up for repairs it remains unbeaten. Only the 9th world remains. Wish me luck in the near future. If you own a Wii, get the game. It's great fun and the reason you own the system.

10. Is Kobe Bryant the best Laker ever?

• This past week, Bryant passed Jerry West as the highest score in Laker history. He passed Mr. Logo in a loss against the Grizzlies. It lead to every NBA analyst giving their top 5 Lakers ever. Kobe made it as high as 2 on Around the Horn with a couple of analysts forgetting about Kareem Abdul-Jabaar. One of which being Bill Plaschke who writes for the Los Angeles Times! Epic fail Bill. No one mentioned Wilt Chamberlain but then again, "the Stilt" had his best years in Philly. Only leading the Lakers to one championship in which he was the finals MVP (1972). Every one's unanimous number one was Magic Johnson, I completely agree. Personally I think it is impossible to find a top 5 that everyone can agree with in any successful franchise. Could anyone really agree with the top 5 Yankees in baseball, Steelers in football or Red Wings in hockey? The best comparison to the magnitude of the Lakers is the Yankees. There would be riots in the streets to determine that top 5. I guarantee.

So there you have it. Just some things that are rambling around this brain of mine. Have any input? Surprised I had a valid thought? Let me hear about it in the comments. I am always open to insults or input. Input would be better though. Thanks for reading and I hope to BS with you again, real soon.

Meet Your New QB Coach Baltimore - Jim Zorn

The last time we heard about Jim Zorn he was being fired. The firing happened immediately when he got off the plane after the last Washington Redskins game in early January. They replaced him with Mike Shanahan within a few days and Zorn was left wondering what was going to happen to his NFL coaching future.

To be fair, Zorn fell into the head coaching job in Washington. Dan Snyder wanted a big name coach like Cowher at the time but no one wanted to take the job. Snyder took to long to pull the trigger so Zorn was bumped from offensive coordinator to head coach. Many thought Snyder overlooked Gregg Williams, who since has gone on to turn the Saints into a Super Bowl-caliber, turnover machine.

So with the Ravens QB coach Hue Jackson heading for greener pastures in Oakland (not really greener but he will be the offensive coordinator there) it was announced today who would replace him. Jim Zorn. Now before everyone freaks out or Steelers fans start mocking us (Alex!), let's realize what title he got here. He will not be calling plays, Cam Cameron still has that job (probably will never get a head coaching gig thanks to that 1 win stint in Miami a couple years ago). He is going to be doing a job he knows how to do. I know Jason Campbell may not have made the Pro Bowl but let's take a look at his numbers.

Campbell has had to deal with a different offense implemented every season since he has been in Washington. However, with Zorn at the helm, Campbell's numbers improved. It was the team that was poor. The year before Zorn got there Campbell's stats looked like this; 13 games, 60% completions, 2700 yards passing, 12 TDs, 11 interceptions and a QB rating of 77.6. Each of those stats have gone up with Zorn in charge. 2008 saw Campbell limit his turnovers and improve his mechanics with this season having career highs in every passing statistic. Unfortunately that included turnovers. This was mostly without the services of Chris Cooley, the Pro Bowl tight end missed most of the season with a leg injury. Campbell is not Joe Flacco, he did not lead a team to back to back playoff appearances and his owner actually wants him as the franchise QB.

So let's look at this as a positive. Zorn knows how to handle QB's. He is a former NFL QB who has done this job for years. Zorn is on a long road back to being trusted to lead another NFL ship. If he turns Flacco into a Pro Bowler like he did with Matt Hasselbeck in Seattle, it may be sooner then you think.

No-no Show-show fo-fo Coco?

If the title makes absolutely no sense then you probably never watched an episode of The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien. I know that everyone has a style of humor that they appreciate, maybe Conan isn't your guy. He's my kind of guy and he will be sadly missed, at least for the next 7 months.



After some serious thought, I realized that I have basically grown up loving the things that O'Brien has done. Whether it was The Simpsons, Saturday Night Live or Late Night with Conan O'Brien I have been a fan for a long time. Mr. O'Brien, if you are reading this, A) thanks for using your free time to check out my blog and 2) you have to own a sweet game system, why read? Since he isn't reading this, because no one has that kind of free time I have been told, I will just wax poetic about his accomplishments. I could do that, bash Jay Leno or NBC. Decisions, decisions.



The high road is a choice not usually taken by yours truly, 98% of readers agree with that. I have too much respect for O'Brien to not bash Leno or the network for what they did. In all honesty, I'm sad to see such a talented guy be taken off the air. Had my emotion been anger I would bash away. Again I know some see his humor as sophmoric, self-depreciating, immature and/or childish crap. On the flip side of that, who cares? He is hilarious!


Other then the obvious skits I will miss of his, mostly his mime abilities will be missed. Whether it is the NBC exec in his evil lair stroking his cat, Sarah Palin, Larry King (suspender pull, suspender pull, glasses = the national sign for Larry King), or his many other inappropriate (guitar riff) moves that coincided with his monologue. Just filing through some Youtube clips of Late Night (just search alternate cable channels for example along with Conan O'Brien or another favorite of mine were the cameos by the Governator Arnold Schwarzanegger/Former President George W. Bush).


Many of us watched as O'Brien gave his emotional, almost tearful, state of mind regarding NBC on Friday. What people who don't watch the show, or who have half a brain, don't realize that this isn't just about Conan. During the final show, honestly the whole final week, he talked about his staff and band (Max Weinberg and the Max Weinberg 7/Tonight Show band) in very high regard. If it weren't for Jimmy Fallon lucking out and having the Roots as his band, I would agree with O'Brien that he had the best band in late night. His show has been nominated previously for it's writing accomplishments. That's right, the crew who gave us the Masterbating Bear (the self pleasuring bear as supposedly called by NBC in O'Brien's seperation papers), was nominated for awards. The great news is the staff will receive a severence, one that I hope includes Andy Richter as I don't know if he will be doing any subpar series on NBC anytime soon. Bring back Andy Richter Controls the Universe! Or just stick with Conan. Either way, it's probably going to happen on Fox.


So that is what we are all questioning now. When or if Conan will be back on a network? Will he go to cable? Will he bring back the infamous James Lipton doing weird acts segment on his show? Who knows? Until then, I will have to catch David Letterman to hear all the latest on Jay bashing. Which, in my opinion, is way funnier then Jay Walking.

Playoff Picks - Part Deux

Do you know who went 4-0 on his picks last week? No, not Chris Berman. Not Mike Ditka. Certainly not Bill Cowher. It was this guy. Little old Brandan Spiegel. The scores may have been wrong but who could see the Ravens destruction of the Pats (Welker would not have saved Brady folks, he wouldn't have been blocking Suggs or Ray Lewis). Who could have seen that epic game in Arizona? No one, however I did pick the Cards so at least I have that.



So with the Wild Card round in the books that leaves the divisional round where we will see two teams who haven't won in nearly a month (Colts and Saints). Included in the madness will be two of the highest powered offenses in the NFL this year leading to the Cards being in yet another shootout. Unlike last week, only one match up is a rematch of a regular season game. Before I get into my analysis early let's jump into the games (which are in order of when they will be televised).





Arizona Cardinals VS New Orleans Saints





Anyone who thought that Green Bay and Arizona put on an offensive display needs to tune in to this one. I don't know if 96 points and over 1,000 yards of offense will be eclipsed but this one should be a shootout. Especially considering that both defenses are questionable when it comes to pass defense. New Orleans really lacks a pass rusher to upset Warner in the pocket and they really could use one. Warner is coming off a game where he had more touchdowns, 5, then incompletions, 4. Drew Brees is utterly ridiculous and could easily match Warner throw for throw. However the problem I have with the Saints is that they haven't won a game in a month, twice when their starters were out there. The Cowboys made them look vulnerable and the Buccaneers proved anyone could beat them at home. While I know that Boldin is probably still going to sit this one out, does it matter? Look at what Doucet and Breaston did last week. Not to mention the awesome TD celebration by Breaston (the Razor Ramon dance,http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vN5CiElINSs kind of hard to see but just awesome).



Prediction: Fans of shootouts tune in! This one is going to be a back and forth game where you don't want to miss anything. Warner and Brees are the NFC's version of a Brady and Manning match up in the AFC. Meaning, as fans, this is a match up of possible hall of fame candidates. Each defense can be abused via the pass but its New Orleans run defense that is the issue. People forget how good the running game of the Cardinals actually is. Beanie Wells had 92 yards on 16 carries this past Sunday. That was against a highly ranked defense. Who knows what he will do against the Saints. Will the Superdome be exploding with excitement? Yes. Will the Saints put up a fight? Definetly. Will the Saints win? I'm not so sure. If it is a close game then the edge goes to the Saints because Neil Rackers has not been himself this season. We all know what the Cardinals did last year. They had a close game at home and then the blew out the number one seed. It could happen again. Cardinals win 35-14





Baltimore Ravens VS Indianapolis Colts



This is the only rematch from the regular season. The game in Baltimore was close but unfortunately the Ravens offense could never get going. Flacco turned the ball over in the red zone and Ed Reed tried to lateral a ball on an excellent return which resulted in a fumble recovered by the Colts. Needless to say, the Ravens gave the game to the Colts. The defense of the Ravens is always great at home but until last week against New England, hadn't impressed anyone on the road. Causing 4 turnovers tends to impress people. Can they play "giant killer" once again? Against the Colts they caused 3 turnovers and only gave up one big play to Garcon. If they do that, who knows what could happen.



Prediction: I will pretend to know what is going to happen. Peyton is well rested and honestly so is Joe Flacco. In their last game they played, each QB wasn't used to his full capacity. Ravens fans love themselves some Joe Flacco, they think he is the second coming(of who I have no idea, Testaverde?). When you look at the numbers for Flacco closely you notice he started hot, like the Ravens, but kinda trailed off throughout the season. His last great game was against the Bears when he threw 4 TDs. Currently, Flacco hasn't thrown a TD in his last two games. Not to mention that Heap was hobbling off the field last week which makes me a little nervous. Clayton making that stellar 17 yard grab does make me feel better for the future, as long as he keeps making plays. Sure, Ray Rice is going to run the ball. Willis McGahee (http://ravens.fandome.com/video/107758/Willis-McGahees-77-Yard-Saturday-Night-TD-Scamper/you got to be kiddin' me! click the link if you are totally clueless) will to. Hey, LeRon McClain might get a carry or two. Flacco is going to have to keep us in the game because we all know that Manning is going to hit at least one bomb to his play makers whether it be Clark, Wayne or Garcon. For the Ravens to win the Colts bombs have to miss their targets, control the clock to keep the ball out of Manning's hands and play lock down defense like last week. If the same team arrives in Indy that left New England, the Colts don't stand a chance. Ravens win 21-17





Dallas Cowboys VS Minnesota Vikings


Brett Favre has never beaten the Cowboys in the playoffs. Let's just say he never beat Troy Aikman in the playoffs. Considering he lost to them three years straight (93-95) when they were Super Bowl contenders. So that stat is a little misleading. Add to the fact that those games were all in Dallas back in the days when home field advantage mattered. Then you see my point. The modern era Cowboys are coming off their first playoff win since '96, a complete demolition of the Eagles, and are currently on a four game winning streak. This is one team even TE Visanthe Shiancoe told Dan Patrick that he didn't want to face. They are the hottest team in the NFC right now and have a lot of people talking about an upset. They have a strong defense and Demarcus Ware is playing out of his mind. On the offensive side of the ball, Romo to Austin seems to be working out a whole lot better then Romo to T.O. Romo isn't turning the ball over and is matriculating the ball down the field with ease lately. The thing that hasn't been proven by these Cowboys is that they haven't played a team with a top caliber running game during their 4 game tear. The Vikes have this guy named Adrian Peterson, I hear he is pretty good. The Boys secondary isn't overly impressive but if they get pressure on Favre he could make a lot of mistakes.


Prediction: Make no mistake about this one either, it is going to be great. In all honesty, the NFC games look better then the AFC. Both games could be close. Personally I don't want either team to win, as a former Niners fan I don't like Favre(read previous posts if you don't believe me) or the Cowboys. Since someone has to win I should probably analyze it a little bit. A lot of what Dallas can do in the passing game depends on whether Antoine Winfield is healthy or not. If he is it makes their secondary substantially better. I don't know who the Vikes played two weeks ago, it wasn't the Giants(they were on vacation clearly). They looked sharp in the game but they were playing a team with a draft pick to play for. Romo idolizes Favre and this will be their first ever meeting in the postseason. I don't know of the old man has any new tricks he can show his young protege. I do know that I would take Peterson over any of the backs in Dallas. He will have more rushing yards then the three headed monster (Felix Jones, Marion Barber III and Tashard Choice). Ray Rice proved that a good back can run all over this defense. I don't think any of these backs will do that against a charged Vikings squad. As far as the Vikings offense, short dip and dunk passes will work if Favre is being pressured considering the playmakers he has with Percy Harvin and Sidney Rice. Visanthe Shiancoe isn't bad in short yardage situations either. He is going to be a monster in the red zone for the Vikes. If you are doing fantasy during the playoffs, here is a sleeper for you. Scoop him up, I'm guessing he will have at least 1 TD. That is, if it isn't the Adrian Peterson show. If the game is close and it comes down to a field goal (a la the Ravens/Vikings game earlier in the season) give the edge to the Vikes. As the Cowboys are relying on someone who has cut by the Redskins. Yeah, those Redskins. Vikings win 31-24


New York Jets VS San Diego Chargers


Sorry Rex, your troops are not the Super Bowl favorite right now. Actually, most experts have the Chargers in the Super Bowl to represent the AFC. So why should I even analyze the game? I mean, game over man! Right? No, unfortunately its not that easy. I told you all the stats last week about the Jets, being the best NFL team this season in defense and running the ball. Then they went out and proved it against the Bengals. What surprised me was the Sanch-ise (Mark Sanchez) completing 80% of his passes and not turning the ball over. Oh yeah, he threw a TD as well. The Chargers, on the other hand, favor the pass. I don't think Vincent Jackson will be a factor this week since he will be visiting Revis Island. Darrelle Revis will shut him down. That isn't analysis as much as it is a known fact. What about LT, the electric glider himself? Will he be just as awful as his Nike viral video? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-owX-EAib8s)


Prediction: My thoughts are no he won't. If Cedric Benson can abuse this defense then so can LT. Rivers is the hottest QB in the league right now and will let everyone know it on Sunday afternoon. Will Revis pick him off? Possibly. It's not like for every Vincent Jackson there isn't another play maker out there. Can any of the Jets linebackers really cover Antonio Gates, LT or Darren Sproles? I don't think so. What about Malcolm Floyd, he has been massively improving throughout the season. During Rivers' off week in week 17 Floyd really shined. There are stellar players everywhere on the offensive side of the ball even though they have been dealing with injuries on their line and their defensive line. The defense throughout the season wasn't stellar. They were in the middle of the pack in most categories and were closer to the bottom of the league in rush defense. As we saw last week in Arizona, regular season stats don't matter. The Packers were second in the league in defense. We all know what happened there! The Jets are going to put up a fight, Rex Ryan won't let them quit. These Chargers are just too much to handle and I don't think Sanchez can string together two great performances in a row(he never did it during the regular season). Who does he think he is? Joe Flacco?!? Chargers win 35-21


I don't know how I will feel if I go perfect two weeks in a row. I may just have to call ESPN and tell them to hook me up. So spread the word readers about the king of all pick ems. Now if I go 0-4, disregard anything I have said. Honestly, I'm just BS-ing with you guys anyway. If you want to challenge me this week let me know your picks in the comment section. That is, if you got the guts!

So You Want to Play a Fantasy Sport

So you want to play a fantasy sport eh? Well I am here to assist you with the hardest thing involving doing just that.

No, I'm not going to tell you who you should pick with your first selection. No, I'm not going to tell you how to annihilate your friends. Although I could tell you how to get annihilated by your buddies. No, that is not what this post is about. My friends and readers alike, this is about the first thing your opponent sees every week. What haunts people's dreams and nightmares. What I am going to help you do folks is...name your team.

This may seem like a mundane and silly task to some. To others (Brandon Waters) it might seem a bit difficult to be creative and come up with your own stuff. I only tease since Brandon borrowed my Lethal Interception Crew name this past season. Unlike some people, I feel the need to change my name every year a la Chad Johnson/Ochocinco/Child Please/WhoGivesaCrap. All of which, in my opinion are awesome. To give you an idea of some of my team names...

B-Town Brawlers, Motherfuggin Snakes (Snakes on a Plane had just come out), AK-Forty Sevens("because when you have to kill every MFer in the room except no substitute", Sam Jackson in Jackie Brown...paraphrased a little, got to keep it clean for the kids), Lethal Interception Crew (Boondocks reference), Team Awesome-O (lame but come on, South Park rules and the league name was battle for awesomeness), A Team Named Slickback (you have to say the whole name, its like A Tribe Called Quest, another Boondocks reference) and Glorious Basterds (because Quentin Tarantino owns my soul).

Now that you have some examples you can steal them or use these few helpful tips.

1. Personnel Related Team Name

• As a fan of Chinese food and Pork Fried Rice, this season in my ESPN league , I thought about calling my team Gore Fried Rice (I had Frank Gore and Ray Rice). I have heard some classics throughout the years like Brady's Bunch, I Just Addai'd in Your Arms Tonight(personal favorite) or The Wieter-Mobile(which is just more proof how awesome Matt Wieters is. My buddy called his team this in our fantasy football league this past season and needless to say he won the championship via epic beatdown proportions). Now some I haven't seen are I'm a Manning I'm 40 (or if you have Matt Forte and a Manning, I'm a Manning I'm Forte), A Rivers Runs Through It, Open the Flood Gates, 64 Calories of MJD or Our Lord Breesus Christ. There are millions of possibilities.

2. Chappelle's Show/Boondocks/South Park/Your Favorite TV Show References

• If you aren't a fan of those selected above it is no big deal. However I have used some references from these shows and have many stored in my memory to use in the future. I haven't used all of these but here are some that can be used - The Playa Hatas, What the 5 Fingas Said to the Face(or just name your team Slap!), Team Named Slickback, Lethal Interception Crew, The Group of Flunkees, We Pee on You, Wu Tang Financial, A MFin Shark Ate Me, I Like Fishsticks, I Made Chili from Ur Parents (South Park reference in case you don't know) and the list could go on for days. Those who know me are probably shocked to not see Family Guy or Simpson references but again, this list could go on for daaaaaaaaaaays.

3. Samuel L. "MFin" Jackson Quotes

• Who Sucks? Not Me!, Motherfuggin Snakes, Yes You Deserve to Lose, I Hope You Burn in Hell, AK-Forty Sevens, Ezekiel 25:17, The Ones who Say Bad MFer on Them and honestly there are endless possibilities. Personally, avoid Black Snake Moan quotes. Most people won't want to admit they watched that movie. If you have a favorite movie of the legend that is SLJ, even if it is Black Snake Moan, take your favorite quote from the movie and make it your team name. In my opinion, it is a fantasy team name win!

4. Pop Culture References

• This can be anything current in our culture. For example, this past season my girl named her team shankapotami because of the E-Trade commercials where the baby calls the guy a shankapotomus. As you read above I named a team Glorious Basterds because readers, "business was-ah boomin'!" This method takes a little humor/creativity. I mean to get one of these all you have to do is watch the ole boob tube.

5. Sports Movie References

• In case of emergency, break open sports movie references. Since I am a fantasy football guy most of my examples are football movies but there is an enormous amount of awesome sport movies that can be referenced. Of course, I will give examples. Necessary Roughness, The Wildcats, The Program, Remember the Titans (Dismembering Titans is also a good one), The Express, Hoosiers (Whoosiers...ooo real creative right?), The Hustlers, We Got Game, I mean I could do this all day. Just like the Sam Jackson quotes, pick a favorite and run with it.

6. Music Group References

• Another never ending list is possible here where you could pick a top musician/group and just go with the flow. Perhaps I may touch on one of your favorites and you can just pilfer one of my ideas. A Tribe on a Quest(stolen from Brandon Waters), RZA the Razors(Razaz), Young Clean Gentlemen (a play on O.D.B. for those who don't know), Ghostface Killahs(spell it however you want), Who Tang Clan, MegaDEATH, Mos Def...inetly Champ, The Funky Homosapiens(Del), Beasts of Boys, Inspectah Deck You in the Face, BBD (Big Bad Dudes), Big Punishers, Disastrous Peoples, Quannum Emcees, Jedi Mind Trix and many many others. Just push the creativity button in that big brain of yours and use it with one of your favorites.

7. Support Your Team/City/Favorite Player

• Whether supporting a favorite team/player by showing them love or hate for a rival, representing a hometown/current city or dissing the location of said hated rival. However it can be done is fine. Some examples seen/used are CowboyKillaz, Ravenssuck(what makes me mad is the dude who named his team that won our league the first season we played fantasy), BlitzBerg, The Steel Curtain, Purple People Eaters, Bmore Brawlers, Urlached-in, and Ray of Light (or now maybe Ray of Rice) are just a few. Either way you go is a victory.

8. Self Promotion

• GETS YOU A MUTE! All Around The Horn references aside, this is one way to talk yourself up in your league. Have you won it all in your league? Won 8 games in a row (some sites let you change your team name anytime, as many times as you want)? Won trophies? Want a trophy? Make it known with a self promotion team name. Something like The Repeater, ThreePeat, I Own You, Complete Pwnage, Johnny 2 Time Champ (can't go wrong with a Goodfellas reference), 8 is GRRREAT, Get a Broom (since I'm sweeping the floor with you, BOO YAH! SWEET SASSY MOLASSEY!), Beatdown Central, Central Beatdown Authority (we authorize the right, to put a whoopin' on you!), etc. etc. Honestly, how would you like to mock your friends and boost your own esteem. Then insert said phrase as your team name and voila, you got yourself a self promotion team name. Now give yourself a pat on the back, you earned it!

9. Self Mockery

• Or did you earn it? Since I haven't earned squat in Yahoo or ESPN, this is going to be my route of choice when it comes to my team name. I am thinking that since I can make it to the playoffs and then choke, I could call my team the December Swooners or Cowboys Circa 2006. If I could get to the championship game repeatedly and lose...I would call my boys the Illadelphia Spiegels. Sorry Philly, haven't won a big game in football/basketball in a long time (woo Phils is what they will say). If those don't tickle your fancy, try these gems on for size. The Baltimorons (sure why not mock your hometown and your knowledge of football, Bea!), No Trophy No Problem, Playoff Pretenders, Suck-ond Place, Legendarily Bad or Can I Get A Little Less Suck. The harder you make it on yourself through a team name the more laughs people will get out of it. You might snicker a little to. Don't lie, you know you will.

10. Inside Jokes

• I don't know if you have any inside jokes with friends, especially those you play fantasy football/baseball/hockey/basketball/badminton/whatever with. Odds are you have one or two that may be able to get twisted into a team name. They could even mock someone. Know of a time a buddy used a horrible pick up line on a girl? Hey, if you remember the line, throw it in there. For example, a friend of a friend was down on the boardwalk in Ocean City, MD. His line(s) were, Hey You in the Yellow/My Watch is Nice. Two separate lines but both with the same result. Being ignored. At the time it was a pretty funny moment. Inside jokes are great to have with your friends and should always be revisited as often as possible. Especially if they mock your opponent because isn't that what fantasy sports are all about? The more you know, now cue the star to shoot over my head.

Some of you are going to say, "That's too many characters for my team name!" Well who's fault is that? Certainly not mine. Besides, who relies on some dude typing his thoughts on some lame blog to name their team anyway? Who? I'll tell you who! Not me!

Playoff Predictions

I can't pretend that after this week's games I am not happy. With everything basically settled in the NFC, everyone had their eye on what the Ravens and Jets were going to do with a playoff spot on the line. Win, that is what they are going to do.



So my prediction of the Texans making the playoffs, fail. My dissing of Merril Hoge for saying the Bengals were going to make the playoffs, fail. My prediction that the Ravens still would make the playoffs, win (in your face Hoge!). So with predictions on my mind I might as well put out my thoughts on what is going to happen in next week's games (all of which are rematches of regular season games, 3 from week 17). So I will go through game by game and explain why I think what I think, I am awesome not being allowed to be why I think a team will win/lose.





New York Jets VS Cincinnati Bengals



The first match up of next weekend puts two of the top 5 defenses against one another. With the Jets at 1 and the Bengals at 4 in overall defense. This game will be short of offense with both teams ranking in the bottom of the NFL in passing offense, 26th for the Bengals and 31st for the Jets respectively, (although the Jets finished the year with the league's best rushing attack, Cincy was 9th). Last night Cincy didn't start their best RB in Cedric Benson while NY unleashed hell in a game they needed to win. The Bengals were without the fire we had seen from them for most of the season while the Jets were clearly fighting for their playoff lives, even though Rex Ryan thought they were eliminated two weeks ago.





Prediction: Pain. Each team has a similar game plan. Run the ball and stop the other team. What has me concerned is how injured is Chad Ochocinco? Revis will shut him down if he plays anyway so either way someone is going to have to step up in the passing game. Will Cincy be able to flick a switch and play as hard as they have the other 15 games this season? I am not so sure. Flacco was the first rookie to win a road playoff game last season, Sanchez may be the second. This game is going to be much closer then week 17's match up, however I think it will have the same result with the Jets winning. Jets win 17-14





Philadelphia Eagles VS Dallas Cowboys





Sunday the roles were reversed from last season, The 'Boys downright embarrassed the Eagles like what the Eagles did to them last season. I never knew an injury to a center could be so costly on the offensive side of the ball but there is a huge lack of communication on the line in Philly. Add to that the Cowboys improvement on the defensive side of the ball and McNabb is going to have a lot of issues getting the ball to his play makers. The numbers for the regular season seem equal but again you have to remember how well Dallas has been playing lately. Romo has thrown 5 interceptions since the bye week back in week 6. This was after throwing 4 in his first 5 games. Could Dallas do to the Eagles what Pittsburgh did to the Ravens last season? Take out a division foe for a third time and eliminate them from playoff contention?





Prediction: It may be a surprise to those that know me that I am picking the Cowboys to win and upset in the next round of the playoffs. Clearly this year might be their year, they couldn't win in December (they just won 3 in a row with 2 shutouts) which is a monkey off their back after their recent performances. They haven't won a playoff game in 13 years (they beat Minnesota back in 1996) so maybe they are due. Especially the way the Eagles looked yesterday, it is hard to predict that they will have a complete turnaround to beat the Cowboys. Add to the fact that McNabb has not beaten them in the playoffs ever (0-3). Cowboys win 31-14





Baltimore Ravens VS New England Patriots





A rematch from way back in week 4, this is one game the Pats didn't want to see in the first round. Honestly, they didn't really want to face either wild card team. Both play them hard and the Jets split the season series. The main issue people have with these two teams is their inability to win on the road (the Ravens better the Pats with a 3-5 mark) which may have some people leaning to the Pats. Especially since they never lost at home during the regular season and haven't lost a first round match up with Belichick running things. Both teams are dealing with injuries for some of their primetime players (Welker is out with ACL/MCL injuries, Ed Reed is a question mark with his hip/groin, Tom Brady has a broken ring finger as well as broken ribs) but what has people thinking the Ravens have a chance is not just the injuries. It is that "undeserved" confidence, I only say that because most people think this group of Ravens has no right to be confident. Why? I have no idea. They aren't scared of the Patriots and feel that they're in the same class as them.





Prediction: Now it would be utterly ridiculous for me to just choose the Ravens because they are the team I follow closely. However, I am going to pick them for more then just that reason. The game should be interesting with strength versus strength (Pats are 3rd in total offense with the Ravens 3rd in total defense) but what has me so optimistic is the improvement of the Ravens offense this season. They are the 5th best rushing team in the league, clearly Willis McGahee is fresh after not being used much prior to last week's ownage of the Raiders (16 carries, 167 yards, 3 TDs), and New England isn't exactly a run stopping team. Last week Arian Foster rushed for 119 yards on 20 carries with 2 visits into the end zone. Again that was on the road where New England is not the same team. Hopefully for me the match up will be similar to the week 4 match up with a different result in the final score. Maybe Clayton will be able to redeem himself? Ravens win 28-24


Green Bay Packers VS Arizona Cardinals


Yet another rematch from week 17 which Kurt Warner was the main starter missing from the Cardinals. However this week may be different. It has been confirmed that Anquan Boldin may miss the game with a ankle/knee injury. That isn't definite, let's remember that this is the guy who came back after just 3 weeks away due to a broken jaw. Boldin plays hurt more then any other player besides maybe Ben Rothlisberger. Rodgers-Cromartie is expected to play however one of their defensive line members is expected to be out. Last time I checked, Aaron Rodgers doesn't enjoy being sacked so that injury helps the Packers. After last season, it is hard for a lot of experts and average Joes like me to predict the demise of the Cardinals. However the stat of them being 3-0 at home in the playoffs is a little skewed. I mean, two of those are from last season. Green Bay wasn't overly impressive on the road but at least they managed to be above .500 (5-3) and the Cardinals were one of the only playoff teams with a subpar record at home (4-4). So another Packers win wouldn't be a complete surprise to me. I don't see them doing to the Cards what they did to them last week.

Prediction: All injuries aside, the Cardinals offense is still powerful. The Packers defense however is just as powerful. Charles Woodson is a candidate for defensive player of the year and his shoulder injury isn't anything serious. Warner playing in the game will be a huge difference from last week. When this team is clicking on all cylinders they are one of the best offenses in the NFL. We saw what a decent offense could do to the Packers just two weeks ago in Pittsburgh. Considering that the Cardinals team we saw last week will not be the same who play this week, you have to assume that Whisenhunt will have his boys ready to execute on Sunday. Cardinals win 31-21



As for the bye teams. I don't see either number 1 seed making it out of next weekend. I don't care who they play.

If you aren't down with that then I got two words for ya! Do better! I challenge you to pick them and when I win, you can get me some grapes. Losers! However if I pick wrong, who is going to know? The 12 people that read this? I can live with that. Until we BS again.